Thursday, September 11, 2008

Existence - Dont you have better things to do?


How did this man manage to capture my thoughts so succinctly?
Is he stalking me telepathically?
Dik Cheney does, maybe this sprong has mastered the ancient art of Purekrapp from his vice-presidential overlord.

Phew, that was close. I emerged from my specially built anti-black hole shelter today after several months of fretting about the inevitable destruction of the universe brought about by those irresponsible Swiss and french egg heads.


Learning, whats it ever done for us, I'll tell you, its kept me locked in a very small room eating my own waste products (I did stock up on tinned foods, but didn't stock up on can openers, they don't teach you shit like that in survival school or if they did I wasn't paying much attention). We all know that those scientific creations like black holes work by sucking in light, all light, even neon and those environmentally friendly ones, so the trick to escaping their deadly zombie inducing rays is to paint every inch of your shelter a very deep shade of black, wearing nothing but black and getting up in the morning (or whatever time of day i get up, its all the same when every things black) and applying heavy goth makeup. The really hard part is your eyeballs, and they are vital, coz when the universe is sucked into the hole the last thing you want is to open your eyes and have the goo contained within to be sucked in with it. Commonsense I know, but you would be surprised how many people don't pay attention to the little details.


Speaking of black holes, Barrack seems to have fallen in one since the Scumbag Collective Meeting a week or so ago. Am I worried? Well yes, constantly, about shit that you probably don't pay any attention to, like killer bees and disposable shavers with 5 blades (can they kill?), but not about the poll bounce on the Palin/Mccain ticket.


That was just a given, even a total loser like Walter Mondale (last seen eating waffles, choking on waffles and calling for someone who knows the Heimlich maneuver, big news in its day, some say as big as the abortion debate as they are both controversial medical procedures forced upon people by communists) got huge bumps in their poll numbers (Mondale even overtook Regan in the polls for a few weeks). But fuck it, these things even out, especially as there is a reason why the Republicans are doing their damnedest to hide their lieing chromosome on stilts from doing anything but give the same speech to the same crowd over and over again. This ploy works for a short while, but then comes the time for questions to be answered in any forum except Fox News (We lie, you gulp and swallow).
The time to panic is not now, with some 50 days to go, the time to panic is the day after the election when the supreme court loaded with drunken whore republican "strict constructionists" hands the Palin/McSame ticket the electoral college votes in the face of Diebolds "foolproof" voting machines showing a swing of 100% to anyone scheming to rob the public purse under the Republican umbrella.


"We cant kill our way to victory."
Adm. Mike Mullen, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff



No but we can lie. No doubt the Palin/McCain camp will ensure that the press tag the (way above pictured) bozo as an Obama official spokesman rather than a man who rather pointedly speaks the truth.


I am so giddy about the US election, its all that we hoped for, a demented old Washington insider who "reluctantly" discusses his time as a POW at least twenty times a speech. Who talks of honor, yet spent his time in the military dropping bombs on civilians, talks of honor while lieing through his teeth and producing ads that equate policies protecting kids from kiddie fiddlers with forcing pre-schoolers to learn the correct technique for giving blowjobs.
Who tells you he "knows how to win wars", ignoring the fact that he has only ever participated in losing wars, who claims to know how to capture Osama, yet refuses to put country first and just do it.
A "maverick" who walks so closely in the Bush footsteps that only his proctologist could tell them apart, who has railed against "earmarks" then chooses the queen of "earmarks" who in turn blatantly lies through her godfearing teeth about basically her entire lifestory, but especially about the earmarks she now no longer has ever heard of.
Its not often that Alaska makes the news for the right reasons, today is no different, so go through the below for a very well informed collection of Alaskan treats.
also released today, the future of the USA's best dressed pre-jail festering sores.
Yep, The Pitbull to Nowhere's mentor, Stevens is one of the tops in corruption.
From this point on the November election is just going to get weirder, but as the Palin/McSame spokes bubble said "this is not a campaign about issues" its about political porn, and I am just about to dive headlong, tongue out in to the bushy muff of a truly twisted, ragged whore. Wish me luck and please send a case of mints for after.

Friday, June 06, 2008

hippy time

IT'S JUST A THOUGHT
(Creedence Clearwater Revival)

Intro : D Dmaj7 Bm A Amaj7 F#m E A E A

E
It's just a thought
A E
But I've noticed something strange,
D Dmaj7 Bm
Getting harder to explain;
A Amaj7 F#m
All the years are passing bye and bye,
E A E
Still I don't know what makes it go;
G D A
Who said to wait and you'll see?

E
It's just a thought
A E
But I wondered if you knew
D Dmaj7 Bm
That the song up there is you.
A Amaj7 F#m
They can't take it from you if you don’t
E A E A E A E
give it away, don't give it away, Ooh, It's given away

E D Dmaj7 C D E F# A E A

E
It's just a thought
A E
But the word has come too late
D Dmaj7 Bm
That a bad idea will take
A Amaj7 F#m
Just about a lifetime to explain,
E A E
And don't you see, good one's gonna be much longer;
G D A
Who's gonna wait, just to see?

E D Dmaj7 C D E F# A E A E A B

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Obama's Victory Speech (history is made)

(for those who can still read, the transcipt)

Tonight, after fifty-four hard-fought contests, our primary season has finally come to an end.

Sixteen months have passed since we first stood together on the steps of the Old State Capitol in Springfield, Illinois. Thousands of miles have been traveled. Millions of voices have been heard. And because of what you said - because you decided that change must come to Washington; because you believed that this year must be different than all the rest; because you chose to listen not to your doubts or your fears but to your greatest hopes and highest aspirations, tonight we mark the end of one historic journey with the beginning of another - a journey that will bring a new and better day to America. Tonight, I can stand before you and say that I will be the Democratic nominee for President of the United States.

I want to thank every American who stood with us over the course of this campaign - through the good days and the bad; from the snows of Cedar Rapids to the sunshine of Sioux Falls. And tonight I also want to thank the men and woman who took this journey with me as fellow candidates for President.

At this defining moment for our nation, we should be proud that our party put forth one of the most talented, qualified field of individuals ever to run for this office. I have not just competed with them as rivals, I have learned from them as friends, as public servants, and as patriots who love America and are willing to work tirelessly to make this country better. They are leaders of this party, and leaders that America will turn to for years to come.

That is particularly true for the candidate who has traveled further on this journey than anyone else. Senator Hillary Clinton has made history in this campaign not just because she's a woman who has done what no woman has done before, but because she's a leader who inspires millions of Americans with her strength, her courage, and her commitment to the causes that brought us here tonight.

We've certainly had our differences over the last sixteen months. But as someone who's shared a stage with her many times, I can tell you that what gets Hillary Clinton up in the morning - even in the face of tough odds - is exactly what sent her and Bill Clinton to sign up for their first campaign in Texas all those years ago; what sent her to work at the Children's Defense Fund and made her fight for health care as First Lady; what led her to the United States Senate and fueled her barrier-breaking campaign for the presidency - an unyielding desire to improve the lives of ordinary Americans, no matter how difficult the fight may be. And you can rest assured that when we finally win the battle for universal health care in this country, she will be central to that victory. When we transform our energy policy and lift our children out of poverty, it will be because she worked to help make it happen. Our party and our country are better off because of her, and I am a better candidate for having had the honor to compete with Hillary Rodham Clinton.

There are those who say that this primary has somehow left us weaker and more divided. Well I say that because of this primary, there are millions of Americans who have cast their ballot for the very first time. There are Independents and Republicans who understand that this election isn't just about the party in charge of Washington, it's about the need to change Washington. There are young people, and African-Americans, and Latinos, and women of all ages who have voted in numbers that have broken records and inspired a nation.

All of you chose to support a candidate you believe in deeply. But at the end of the day, we aren't the reason you came out and waited in lines that stretched block after block to make your voice heard. You didn't do that because of me or Senator Clinton or anyone else. You did it because you know in your hearts that at this moment - a moment that will define a generation - we cannot afford to keep doing what we've been doing. We owe our children a better future. We owe our country a better future. And for all those who dream of that future tonight, I say - let us begin the work together. Let us unite in common effort to chart a new course for America.

In just a few short months, the Republican Party will arrive in St. Paul with a very different agenda. They will come here to nominate John McCain, a man who has served this country heroically. I honor that service, and I respect his many accomplishments, even if he chooses to deny mine. My differences with him are not personal; they are with the policies he has proposed in this campaign.

Because while John McCain can legitimately tout moments of independence from his party in the past, such independence has not been the hallmark of his presidential campaign.
It's not change when John McCain decided to stand with George Bush ninety-five percent of the time, as he did in the Senate last year.

It's not change when he offers four more years of Bush economic policies that have failed to create well-paying jobs, or insure our workers, or help Americans afford the skyrocketing cost of college - policies that have lowered the real incomes of the average American family, widened the gap between Wall Street and Main Street, and left our children with a mountain of debt.

And it's not change when he promises to continue a policy in Iraq that asks everything of our brave men and women in uniform and nothing of Iraqi politicians - a policy where all we look for are reasons to stay in Iraq, while we spend billions of dollars a month on a war that isn't making the American people any safer.

So I'll say this - there are many words to describe John McCain's attempt to pass off his embrace of George Bush's policies as bipartisan and new. But change is not one of them.

Change is a foreign policy that doesn't begin and end with a war that should've never been authorized and never been waged. I won't stand here and pretend that there are many good options left in Iraq, but what's not an option is leaving our troops in that country for the next hundred years - especially at a time when our military is overstretched, our nation is isolated, and nearly every other threat to America is being ignored.

We must be as careful getting out of Iraq as we were careless getting in - but start leaving we must. It's time for Iraqis to take responsibility for their future. It's time to rebuild our military and give our veterans the care they need and the benefits they deserve when they come home. It's time to refocus our efforts on al Qaeda's leadership and Afghanistan, and rally the world against the common threats of the 21st century - terrorism and nuclear weapons; climate change and poverty; genocide and disease. That's what change is.

Change is realizing that meeting today's threats requires not just our firepower, but the power of our diplomacy - tough, direct diplomacy where the President of the United States isn't afraid to let any petty dictator know where America stands and what we stand for. We must once again have the courage and conviction to lead the free world. That is the legacy of Roosevelt, and Truman, and Kennedy. That's what the American people want. That's what change is.

Change is building an economy that rewards not just wealth, but the work and workers who created it. It's understanding that the struggles facing working families can't be solved by spending billions of dollars on more tax breaks for big corporations and wealthy CEOs, but by giving a the middle-class a tax break, and investing in our crumbling infrastructure, and transforming how we use energy, and improving our schools, and renewing our commitment to science and innovation. It's understanding that fiscal responsibility and shared prosperity can go hand-in-hand, as they did when Bill Clinton was President.

John McCain has spent a lot of time talking about trips to Iraq in the last few weeks, but maybe if he spent some time taking trips to the cities and towns that have been hardest hit by this economy - cities in Michigan, and Ohio, and right here in Minnesota - he'd understand the kind of change that people are looking for.

Maybe if he went to Iowa and met the student who works the night shift after a full day of class and still can't pay the medical bills for a sister who's ill, he'd understand that she can't afford four more years of a health care plan that only takes care of the healthy and wealthy. She needs us to pass health care plan that guarantees insurance to every American who wants it and brings down premiums for every family who needs it. That's the change we need.

Maybe if he went to Pennsylvania and met the man who lost his job but can't even afford the gas to drive around and look for a new one, he'd understand that we can't afford four more years of our addiction to oil from dictators. That man needs us to pass an energy policy that works with automakers to raise fuel standards, and makes corporations pay for their pollution, and oil companies invest their record profits in a clean energy future - an energy policy that will create millions of new jobs that pay well and can't be outsourced. That's the change we need.

And maybe if he spent some time in the schools of South Carolina or St. Paul or where he spoke tonight in New Orleans, he'd understand that we can't afford to leave the money behind for No Child Left Behind; that we owe it to our children to invest in early childhood education; to recruit an army of new teachers and give them better pay and more support; to finally decide that in this global economy, the chance to get a college education should not be a privilege for the wealthy few, but the birthright of every American. That's the change we need in America. That's why I'm running for President.

The other side will come here in September and offer a very different set of policies and positions, and that is a debate I look forward to. It is a debate the American people deserve. But what you don't deserve is another election that's governed by fear, and innuendo, and division. What you won't hear from this campaign or this party is the kind of politics that uses religion as a wedge, and patriotism as a bludgeon - that sees our opponents not as competitors to challenge, but enemies to demonize. Because we may call ourselves Democrats and Republicans, but we are Americans first. We are always Americans first.

Despite what the good Senator from Arizona said tonight, I have seen people of differing views and opinions find common cause many times during my two decades in public life, and I have brought many together myself. I've walked arm-in-arm with community leaders on the South Side of Chicago and watched tensions fade as black, white, and Latino fought together for good jobs and good schools. I've sat across the table from law enforcement and civil rights advocates to reform a criminal justice system that sent thirteen innocent people to death row. And I've worked with friends in the other party to provide more children with health insurance and more working families with a tax break; to curb the spread of nuclear weapons and ensure that the American people know where their tax dollars are being spent; and to reduce the influence of lobbyists who have all too often set the agenda in Washington.

In our country, I have found that this cooperation happens not because we agree on everything, but because behind all the labels and false divisions and categories that define us; beyond all the petty bickering and point-scoring in Washington, Americans are a decent, generous, compassionate people, united by common challenges and common hopes. And every so often, there are moments which call on that fundamental goodness to make this country great again.
So it was for that band of patriots who declared in a Philadelphia hall the formation of a more perfect union; and for all those who gave on the fields of Gettysburg and Antietam their last full measure of devotion to save that same union.

So it was for the Greatest Generation that conquered fear itself, and liberated a continent from tyranny, and made this country home to untold opportunity and prosperity.

So it was for the workers who stood out on the picket lines; the women who shattered glass ceilings; the children who braved a Selma bridge for freedom's cause.

So it has been for every generation that faced down the greatest challenges and the most improbable odds to leave their children a world that's better, and kinder, and more just.
And so it must be for us.

America, this is our moment. This is our time. Our time to turn the page on the policies of the past. Our time to bring new energy and new ideas to the challenges we face. Our time to offer a new direction for the country we love.

The journey will be difficult. The road will be long. I face this challenge with profound humility, and knowledge of my own limitations. But I also face it with limitless faith in the capacity of the American people. Because if we are willing to work for it, and fight for it, and believe in it, then I am absolutely certain that generations from now, we will be able to look back and tell our children that this was the moment when we began to provide care for the sick and good jobs to the jobless; this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal; this was the moment when we ended a war and secured our nation and restored our image as the last, best hope on Earth. This was the moment - this was the time - when we came together to remake this great nation so that it may always reflect our very best selves, and our highest ideals. Thank you, God Bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America. Barack Obama is a Democratic Senator from Illinois and a candidate for the Democratic presidential nomination.

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

i got a foggy notion

Will tomorrow be the day that Barack steps up to the plate and moves one step closer to ending the shameful Bush Regency. Once respected Senator McSame has no chance in hell of continuing the failure, here's why:

82% of Americans think the country is on the wrong track.
60+% think that the US should talk to their enemies (in other words engage in diplomacy)
consumer confidence at its lowest point since 1992.

it will be a slaughter for the GOP and I am sharpening the Halal blade as we speak. I'm still full of the audacity of hope that Hillary will climb on board as VP, but only time and Barack paying off her debts will resolve that one.

“As far as Colorado Republicans are concerned, we all will support McCain, but he’s not our first choice,” said Summer Vanderbilt, a University of Colorado at Colorado Springs student and alternate delegate to the Republican National Convention

tales from creation

in the US:
22 percent believe President Bush knew about the 9/11 attacks in advance.
30 percent believe Saddam had weapons of mass destruction.
23 percent believe they've been in the presence of a ghost.
18 percent believe the sun revolves around the Earth.
12 percent believe Barack Obama is a Muslim.

fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on the education system and Fox news.

The rise of creationism in Britain to the point where four out of 10 Britons believe it to be the literal truth – as well as the idea being taught in state-approved schools – has spread alarm throughout the scientific community.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/scientists-rally-against-creationist-superstition-837832.html

Go on at least read it, be inspired, then laugh your arse off over the "proof", it really is hilarious, until a child gets taught: warning contains symbols for credit cards, clicking on them does not bring you closer to Jesus, only bankruptcy.

http://www.disprovedarwin.com/DisproveDarwinNowAvailable.html

For all you "educationalist" egg heads, here is a University that may suit, get a degree in biology in less time than it takes to get a pass to flip burgers at Macca's. All you have to do is renounce any semblance of science and acknowledge that Darwin was most likely Satan hiding behind a fake beard. Hint: answer to all difficult questions on exams is "God did it"

http://www.icr.edu/biology/

viewpoint discrimination? political correctness? I know you peeple are fcuking nuts. That Dick Cheney is a total scumbag is a view point, Dick Cheney is a liar who shot a guy in the face and profits from war is a fact.

http://www.onenewsnow.com/Education/Default.aspx?id=126854

tales from the drug war
Here are a couple of simple facts:
the only reason "criminals" control the illegal drug trade is the enormous profits that can be made, yet on an ordinary suburban block, you can grow most drugs from seeds at naught more than the cost of the upkeep of a tomato plant.
speed: if its good enough for the US Air force....
u r passing another wild eyed Linfox representative.
opiates: poppy's grow wonderfully well in these temperate climes and would supply an addict all they need, the government could then funnel those billions they currently spend on policing/courts/prisons on something useful like rehab.
Spliff: a three to five plant limit would supply the average smoker with his/her yearly supply, and get them into the funny sunny world of gardening, that should also cut down on their three pack a day Doritos habit.
cocaine: the cocoa plant, grown, worshipped and used for a thousand years in sth America, to give you an idea of the profits a man may make from this straggly plant, a perfectly legal $300 bottle of liquid cocaine straight from the labs of Merck or Pfizer and used in the dental industry can sell for as much as $10,000. Tempted? Consult the brush your dentist uses.
Hallucinogenics: mushies grow wild throughout the hills of Melbourne (do get someone who knows what they are looking for), peyote and all those bizarre cacti will grow wonderfully, if a trifle slowly, in a simple glass house and get your rocks to the place of offness very nicely, thank you very much.
Eckies: oh you love-up generation, you will need to at least finish the first two years of your chem degree, but the good news is that, yes, you can grow the plant to get you started:
Synthesis Industrial scale methamphetamine/MDMA factory in Cikande, Indonesia
Safrole, a colorless or slightly yellow oil, extracted from the root-bark or the fruit of sassafras plants is the primary precursor for all manufacture of MDMA. There are numerous synthetic methods available in the literature to convert safrole into MDMA via different intermediates. One common route is via the MDP2P (3,4-methylenedioxyphenyl-2-propanone, also known as piperonyl acetone) intermediate. This intermediate can be produced in at least two different ways. One method is to isomerize safrole in the presence of a strong base to isosafrole and then oxidize isosafrole to MDP2P. Another, reportedly better method, is to make use of the Wacker process to oxidize safrole directly to the MDP2P (3,4-methylenedioxy phenyl-2-propanone) intermediate. This can be done with a palladium catalyst. Once the MDP2P intermediate has been produced it is then consumed via a reductive amination to form MDMA as the product.
So remind me why I shell out my hard earneds, and why its only the cops and the crims who are reaping Exxon styled windfall profits......

My name is Michael Short. I am here because in 1992 I was sentenced for selling crack cocaine. Before that, I had never spent a day in prison. I came from a good family. I had no criminal history. I was not a violent offender. But I was sentenced to serve nearly 20 years. I was 21 years old.

ONE of the nation's top criminal investigators in charge of fighting organised crime has been arrested for allegedly masterminding a plan to cook up the nation's biggest batch of the deadly designer drug ice.
The funniest part of the story: the drugs have mysteriously disapeared...
Tales from the occupied territories.
I feel stupid that I need to say this, but I 100% support the right of Israel to exist, I support the right of Israel to exist within her own borders, not other peoples. I do not in any way support the religious extremists settler movement, or any of their supporter base, such as war criminal Ariel Sharon or Mr 2% Olmert or the woman who has been angling for his job for the last year or so, Tzipi Livni..period.fullstop.
Peace in our time means returning the Golan Heights to Syria, and for Israel to return to her own borders, 1967 style or at the very least a genuine equitable carve up of the occupied territories.
till then, everything is tainted.
Dozens of skeletons from the early Islamic period were discovered during excavations near the Temple Mount, on a site slated for construction by a right-wing Jewish organization.
the soon to be indicted Mr 2% speaks:
"Israeli sovereignty over historic and holy Jerusalem, will last for eternity," Mr Olmert said.
Plans announced by the Olmert Government to build 884 new homes in two Jewish settlements in east Jerusalem to mark the anniversary drew new criticism from both the United Nations and key ally the United States.

Friday, May 09, 2008

so, you think therefore you am.





Re: Bill Henson and his imminent arrest

my only comment on this ridiculous matter (i am busy watching porn, well watching, its a contact sport really), I would believe the outrage, the charges, the reaction of Chairman Rudd etc if they raided the offices of Vogue, Elle, Dolly, every advertising agency etc each time they placed a 12-16 in one of their products. Same goes for all those wonderful Fashion Weeks where I have had the dubious pleasure of chatting to beautiful 15 year olds as they tune up their attire. Until then it is just a vacuous load of puritan morality masquerading as law enforcement, no doubt driven by those wonderful friends of the vacuous, the religious right

Me, I find Playboy and Penthouse offensive, filled as they are with the products of the surgeons knife and the photoshop brush.

Current Moral Panics Sweeping the Nation:

1. Binge Drinking:

I love nostalgia, the six o'clock swill, god that was a great time, 5.50pm order as many beers as will fit on the bar and then drink them all before the bell goes to signal "Fuck Orf". Now they were the times when this land was filled with "Authentic Australians". I'm not old enough to have lived it, but I'm sure that it was conducive to civilized behavior in our model citizen's. Kids today, they just have no idea and so should be forced to do exactly as anybody over 50 tells them and if they don't obey instantly, they should have their neon coloured skate boards dismantled in front of them. Better yet, anyone who has over three drinks in the first hour should be jailed and sodomised to teach them the meaning good old fashioned morals.

What a complete load of fcuking twaddle. Let me drink and keep your fucking morals out of my vodka and I promise not to piss in the holy water at your next evangelical mystical experience. Better yet, just fuck off, completely.

1a. 2.00am

the truth is that the best people don't go out until 1.00am, the best time to roam the streets is after midnight, I mean, the drugs dont kick in till then and if I can get into Geddes Lane then I shall die on the streets of dehydration. Why do you wish to kill me? Why?

I don't want to be stuck in the Pony after the last band has finished at 2.30-3.00am, I wanna get high, I wanna be free, god I need a drink.

2. Ice

If you really cared about your kids then you would legalise drugs, then they could have the same clean high quality drugs like long dead UK PM Anthony Eden and US fighter pilots are given. When drugs are criminalised, then only criminals will supply drugs and they don't always have the best quality control mechanisms.

3. Anything to do with people under the age of 18

I agree, jail the little bitches til they see sense at age 24.

4. the price of oil

mmmmmmm lets see, you voted a few years back for a man who promised you low interest rates, even though he had no control over them. Now your bitchin about the Ruddsters high cost of oil, even though he's got nothing to do with setting the price. What the fuck are you morons talking about, either bring down global capitalism or fuck off back to whatever beaver you crawled out of.

Are you all sorry that instead of investing in alternate fuels and public transport you have been voting for tax cuts and the lobbyist's for the fossil fuel industry. No, you cant see the nexus? Holy fcuk batman.

5. Pensioners

Has there ever been a day when an old fart hasn't had something to complain about? No, welcome to the real world.

6. dredging the bay

despite the fact that our beautiful bay has been used and abused for a hundred years, the Blue Wedges folk would have you believe that it is "pristine". Bullshit, lets get the dredging out the way and the bay will heal itself, its what nature does. Taking a photo of a dead fish and then telling me that every fish the bay looks exactly the same will not make me believe that maybe you are hyping a threat to WMD Cheney standards. The mushroom cloud is not imminent, its shittake.

7. sheep's bums

having had the rather scarring task of putting a bullet in the head of flyblown sheep, I would ask the hysterical folks of PETA to re-consider. I am with them re: battery hens, battery cattle etc, I do believe that animal welfare in our food chain is of vital concern, I am a carnivore who does care. But....ahhh fuk it, I just hate sanctimonious friggin vegos, that's why this is here. Fcuk PETA.

8. Fat Kids

lets be sensible about this, if we publicly kill a few, maybe the rest will get the message about exercise. I know my ample proportions are the result of love, not hate and each inch contains a mound of lovely comestibles.

9. Muslims

When they are not trying to kill us, they are mocking our values by existing. This needs to be stopped, I congratulate the citzens of Camden on thier way of sidestepping intelligence through bureaucratic means, its true within every copy of the Koran there is a Dik Smith guide to bomb making. I find it so hard as an atheist defending superstition, but I will defend to the death (or a serious sprain) your right to be free to make the choice.

The agents of intolerance must be exposed for what they are, and what they are hiding behind. To those fcukwits who wrap themselves behind our flag and shriek about "values", just try to be honest and come out and give me your racism. I wont respect you for holding the thought, but I will uphold your right to be a total waste of good air.

....................................

"If you just let me go to Pyongyang, I'll get you a deal," the career Foreign Service officer said, prompting others to roll their eyes and move on.
In the twilight of the Bush presidency, the nuclear agreement that Hill has tirelessly pursued over the past three years has emerged as Bush's best hope for a lasting foreign policy success. In the process, Hill has become the public face of an extraordinary 180-degree policy shift on North Korea, from confrontation to accommodation.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/05/25/AR2008052502805.html


McCain: "It's clear who Hamas wants to be the next President."

Here's how you can help in the War on Terror, a practical guide to keeping your good self out of Gitmo....

http://trackingtransience.net./


http://www.wired.com/techbiz/people/magazine/15-06/ps_transparency

...................................................
2,784 people killed, 119,400 injured and over $172,038,000 in economic damages
Here are 16,820 people who were harmed by someone not thinking critically.

http://whatstheharm.net/kids.html

Not all information is created equal. Some of it is correct. Some of it is incorrect. Some of it is carefully balanced. Some of it is heavily biased. Some of it is just plain crazy.
....................................................

just?


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tony-newman/drug-war-madness-smoke-a_b_103911.html


.....................................
Re: the Rudd Leaks and the end of his honeymoon
I have two theories, neither really worthwhile.

a/ the other members of Rudds Cabinet are getting a little tired of being puppets and reading from Rudds prepared statements, rather than doing what they are paid for, making and implementing policy. You can only micro-manage so much before the people you are micro-managing start to resent the puppeteers strings.

b/ there are a thousand good reasons why after a long time in opposition and you gain power that in the first days in office you do a lot of bloodletting amongst your senior staff inherited from the previous administration. Howard did after all make an artform of placing like minded liberals in senior policy positions within the bureaucracy, and Rudd made a big play of not getting rid of them. Now he is paying the price. Unsheathe those knives pretty boy, the blood on the carpet will only make you look stronger, the bodies piling up beneath the stairs will remind the public service that Stalin was not all beer and ice cream, but a bit of a cad when it came to HR. Bring on the night of the long knives.

If you blend these two together, I'm pretty sure I'm close to the stating the obvious.

hell who am i kidding, I am only posting coz I aint for a while. Holidays, they come in all varieties, colours, shades and creeds.

Friday, April 18, 2008

tune in, fuck off and change the laws

the war on drugs

preaching to the converted, I know but surely one day, one day the bullshit will not flow and I will be free. Till then, just know that the facts are on your side, the falsehoods, the lies, the corruption, the pointeless hysteria masquerading as law, are all on the side of the self righteous.

http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=0HD6B94RURA&feature=related

http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-lEm-IYuQU&feature=related

http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=GVRUpmlEXJ4

Friday, April 11, 2008

iraq decoder 08

significant progress: a long running joke, first used in 2003 then at every opportunity since, great for best mans speech's at weddings or to signify a mysterious gap between reality and preceding sentence.

progress: going backwards at a slower pace.

serious challenge: going backwards in an uncontrolled fashion

success: complete failure that can be made to look like the outcome was just as predicted eg Basra 2008

Turning Point: updated after test marketing found overuse syndrome, now refereed to as "convergence point". Use in Friedmans (6 monthly time period) essential for all future press releases.

consolidate recent security gains: as above, but generally used when reality has spiraled so far out of control and the Iraq War Marketing Department have identified body of 6 year old in photos as insurgent or terrorists. Iraq has been consolidated so many times it is surprising the entire country is not able to be contained within a 6 x 6 room.

"a free Iraq": an Iraqi who has fled to Denmark and been given a refugee visa. Once held post of trauma surgeon at Basra General, now sells kebabs at Copenhagen Docks (late shift 2am-10am).

stand by themselves: the ability of Iraqi's to kill other Iraqi's.


supporting role: to be used whenever Iraq Security Forces changes sides during "consolidation" operation and needs to have freedom bullets fired in their general direction by their US overlords.

100 years: the time it will take for historians to find something the Bush Administration did right. Also likely time frame for troop withdrawal.

experience: the ability to fail miserably over a lengthy period of time.

The troops: meat puppets dangling from political strings.

surge: dangling of meat puppets over hot coals until done. Can be used in place of actively thinking about policy, often used in conjunction with and/or in same sentence with "turning point", "progress", "significant progress" and leading brand of all in one toothpaste/tinea treatment.

evidence: mysterious cloud of hot gas masquerading as a "fact"

Jesus: vengeful Deity whom all Muslims will eventually be persuaded to follow.

Maliki government: strange multi lingual beast, known to be able to say one thing in English and the exact opposite in Arabic while maintaining that they are in fact the same thing. Rumoured to live in a cave in the green zone, emerging to "vote" before scurrying back to discussions on what they did not vote on. Known to eat American dollars and love Persian food.

national unity government: original name of Malaki Government before change by deed poll, still used by Fox News, so you know its gots to wrong.

“strong leader,” and a “good guy” with “deep determination.”: The Malaki Government when the Bush administration doesn't wish to listen to what the Malaki Government has proposed.

Iranian-backed militants: Friends of the Malaki government.

Green zone: large target in centre of Capitol city used for artillery practice only.

tie the hands of our commanders: a refusal to answer specific questions that may lead to embarrassing answers when asked by Congress. Also answer to any question which may stray from "stay the course" line of questioning.

impose artificial time lines for withdrawal: same as "don't ask, don't tell" policy or 2005 buzz word "benchmarks", a meaningless way to pad out a sentence in answer to a question you don't wish to answer.

burden worth bearing: either a naked 16 yo supermodel sitting on your face or a well worn cliche taken from an old pamphlet left over from the US war of independence. Churchillian in its resonance when applied to supermodel, used mostly when handing over multi-billion dollar cheque to Haliburton Subsidiary in Oval room at Whitehouse.

Iran (Iraqi): close ally and honored neighbouring country

Iran (US): monolithic evil force, killed JFK (photos provided) and Tupac (doll reenactment upon request) and scares young children with cloudy mushrooms. Was Hitler in a previous life. Also known use as a "mantra" for meditating neo-cons, replaces "Saddam" and "imminent threat".

Iranian-backed Shia groups: the Malaki Government

America will act to protect our interests and our troops: long running sitcom whose ratings are way down, after initial stirring successes since it was revealed that the same script has been recycled nightly for the past five years.

US out: catchy Iraqi pop song that has dominated the popular charts for many years, noted for its 70% harmonies and killer hook on chorus of "death to America" sung with high pitched 60% harmonies.

Curfews: Freedom timeouts called on misbehaving Iraqi citizens when ADHD drugs shipment into capitol has been hijacked.

long-term American military occupation: fictional tale that may well be based upon truth. see November 08

Senior Al-Qaeda Commander Dead: fictional account to be used in press releases when President has to answer questions he would rather not talk about. Tracks well with conservatives and makes them believe that it goes well with "staying the course" at all you can eat pancake house's. Another way of saying "whats that behind you?" when wishing to flee room.

Iraqi security forces: any Iraqi carrying a gun, but not yet shooting at Americans.

Insurgent (1): any Iraqi carrying a gun who may have shot at Americans.

Insurgent (2): any Iraqi shot by Americans. See IDF rules of engagement for explanation eg "we only shoot at terrorists, therefor anyone shot by the IDF is by definition a terrorist"

Benchmarks: long lost document now only seen in photocopy's of original press release from 2005, used primarily to stave off questions about "success" and "serious challengers", now seen as mythical products of fevered minds. Can be used as profane and obscene word when used by neo-cons and Bush Administration in relation to Democrats trying to "tie the hands of our commanders" with fact based reasoning.

cost: meaningless phrase like sacrifice or value/s, can be used in a thousand inventive ways but always ends the same way, with a cheque being forwarded to Dick Cheney's preferred charity, Haliburton.

Exit: narrow gap through a whirling phalanx of knives with a starving bear waiting at the end of a long dark tunnel. Not recommended for consideration or discussion by adults.

Exit Strategy: see above, but with more bears.

violence: multi-faceted word without precise meaning eg "A year ago, the president said we couldn't withdraw because there was too much violence," said Sen. Edward M. Kennedy (D-Mass.). "Now he says we can't afford to withdraw because violence is down."

overall levels of violence: if you take a graph of all known geological time and place a red white and blue marker over the section inhabited by the Iraq war, you will see that there have been significantly less people eaten by dinosaurs in Iraq since beginning of 2003. Mark down under "success".

political-military calculus: clever turn of phrase by military man to deflect questioner from asking what the hell he means by "political-military calculus". Can you buy it in an electronics store and is it solar powered?

process of assessment: stalling for time

consolidation and evaluation: stalling for time while waiting to find blind watchmaker to repair Political-Military Calculus.

conditions on the ground: foot gazing exercise revealing baked on mud, sand, sperm and blood which in combination can be said to be chocolate or chocolate like in its palatable flavour.

September (1): a fictional date in the future when "process of assessment" will need to be "evaluated" according to "conditions on the ground", in reality the word September means March 2009 when "process of assessment" will need to be "evaluated" according to "conditions on the ground".

September (2): date plucked from an historical textbook, in Latin means; can we move onto the next question as I do not wish to answer that question.

"success is within reach": John McCain inserting tube of hemorrhoid cream without needing to call Joe Lieberman.