oh those arabs...and a boring englishman

Now Im not one to court controversy, my moderate, populist views on most subjects are instantly agreed upon by sane, sensible, rational, inteligent people, and when there not, well the other side are just plain batshit nuts or misinformed, filthy, liars, so I say this with some degree of trepidation.

Nicholas Stern, UK climate guru, is just dull, deadly dull and ever so buearacratically sodden that I find reading his report just reminds me of how fucking excruciatingly dull he really is. A montone flatness set on the plateau of shimmeringly endless boredom unreleaved by even a hint of what some laughingly refer to as humanity. He is the eptitome of the modern politician and/or public servant. I would personally not follow him into the most expensive bordello in all the world for a nights pleasure with eva green soaked in pheremones, cause I would know at the end of the night and for the rest of my life, I would not remember eva, it would be Nicholas's droning bray that would resonate. Now I would probably think very hard on it, but Ive made my choice and Im sticking to it. Sure he may be right, he may even be a bit bloody clever n all that, but fuck...I mean fuck..no I have done enough damage to the enviromental movement as is with my wanton attack, but I speak the truth and the world be damned if it cant handle me flying off it, the handle that is. If you agree with my call, place a vote on our voteline, if you disagree, try and find the voteline.

Our aging PM, agrees with me, in essence and probably substance, he like I, is a climate realist, I realise that there is an enviroment, I know I try to get rid of it with the aircondtioning. While couching his loathing of being bothered by "climate" in lovingly crafted and test marketed phrases, like "practical action", "encourage sustainable forest management and support reforestation" or "effective, coordinated and global approach", he is of course, saying, fuck you that i have to make up some shit until we win the next election. This phrase tested very poorly in focus groups, many found it to be only marginally better than the blow upon nethers by a spiked wooden plank, which has consistently polled poorly. The world clearly doesnt need more forests, weve spent most of the past 10 millenia getting the fuckers out of the way of our pristine views and into more manageble areas like pots where we can arrange them in a more pleasing form, not the unruly hedonism of that pagan whore, natures unkempt fossil pile. Nature has clearly never heard of feng shui or interior decorating (have you ever looked inside a cave, messy, unkempt and shits everywhere like my place on a sunday morning, one word, disgusting), and yet we are meant to believe that we are apart of it, no, its is ours as god intended to do whatever the fuck it is that you sick twisted individuals want to do with it. Dont take my word, read your bible, then tell me how it ends, its one long boring book, which brings us right back to where we started, with the word and the word is Stern.

"When it comes to the decisions of the Government, uppermost in our mind will be the national interest, not the views of any one individual, however eminent he may be regarded by some," Our PM said, reverting to the time tested and focus pulled, Mr Angry mode. "I believe, if implemented, literally would do great damage to the Australian economy," Take that nature, you slovenly whore.

I can also whole heartedly agree with the new government policy of growing trees in foriegn countries, let those others who are less experienced with all the terror that can be found hiding in a forest deal with it in a corrupt and entertaining manner. With all of our close neighbours more than willing, in fact in most cases very insistant upon taking wads of cash for almost anything, throwing stacks of it at them to cure our "problems" is imminently sensible and as long as we dont look to closely at the outcomes, an outcome for our income.

Its not often that I find myself agreeing with anything the Saudi Royal Family say, unless its to do with women drivers or the enduring national shame of us giving them the vote (women, not Saudis, Saudis know thier place in the pantheon of democracy, hide in the cupboard until the mood passes), so its was good to see that the "peace plan" mooted by the Saudis some five or six years ago and rejected out of hand by the then Sharon Government is finally getting a look in.

The plan is a simple one on the face of it, every Arab country would formally recognise Israel in return for a withdrawal from all the land captured in the war of 1967. Its not quite as comprehensive in the fine detail, with Jerusalem being petitioned and the east being the new Palestinian capital, so the 1967 borders would be somewhat different, but in essence it is, and was then when first proposed, a geniune breakthrough of many magnitudes, if accepted. And that is the big, impossible, if.

Some will look at the Saudis words "It has never been proven that reaching out to Israel achieves anything. Other Arab countries have recognised Israel and what has that achieved?" as needlessly agressive, but there is an enormous amount of truth in them. The PLO recognised Israel many, many years back and the best you can say for thier efforts was an increase in settlement building and a thousand broken promises on the Israeli's part.

"The largest Arab country, Egypt, recognised Israel and what was the result? Not one iota of change happened in the attitude of Israel towards peace."

The Israeli governement have an instant answer which has nothing to do with the offer

It fears any hint that Palestinian refugees would have the right to return to their homes in the event of a peace settlement.

The if that seems like a glance sideways at something not in the agreement just for the sake of derailing even the idea of considering it, they can always look at their impasse on Hama's as a further reason to reject it, even though Hama's will be apart of the eventual state of Palestien, wether Israel wishes it to be or not.

When I first heard of the Saudi offer in 2002, my first thoughts were of how incredibly niave, yet incredibly sensible and brave from the Saudi's, a comprhensive peace with all Arab states for Israel in exchange for what they have promised will eventually happen. No, the plan was orginally just dismissed out of hand by the Sharon hardliners and a another great moment in history seemingly passed into that great maw of perpetual conflict. Will Israel ever truly get serious about wanting peace, or are the power plays within its own scandal ridden democracy to be forever subsumed beneath the boots of fundementalists and the settler movement.

Now Condi Rice has been told to pack her bags and leave by the Isreali's, the Greater Isreal lobby has once again proven to be as powerful as the neo-cons and the evangalical movement has been in steering anything sensible in the US. The lords of war will always win in the present enviroment, a flower is easily broken beneath a tanks treads.