Wangsway..the ancient art of wedging
wedge 1..nuclear
Prime Minister John Howard says Melbourne businessman Ron Walker told him last year about his plan to start a nuclear energy company. "The Government is not having any secret discussions," Mr Howard told Parliament. (we just didnt think it was worthwhile telling anyone about it)
and a nice little secret chicken and the egg scenario for our increasingly weasily, PM. So how about a referndum on the matter at the next election, how about calling it now.
wedge 2 ...immigration
new citzenship tests, the "values" and "history" tests and of course, the english test. Will there be a burqua test, eg if you wear a burqua, or if you want to push it a bit further a scarfe, you fail. Never underestimate the power of a percentage of the Australian electorate to vote them immigrants elsewhere, even while eating a souvlaki or wolfing down some yum cha. WhiteAustralia will make a values laden comeback, I think that "White Power" t-shirts should be compulsory at all citzenship ceremonies, that should sort the wheat fromthe shovels.
Prime Minister John Howard seems to be appealing to supporters of Queensland politician Pauline Hanson with his package of change to citizenship laws, Australian Democrats leader Lyn Allison says."It's very difficult to understand why the government is doing this, except to say it's part of the prime minister's package of demonising those who come from other countries, appealing to the Hansonite supporters of this world who essentially don't want to see Australia as anything but white Australian."
wedge 3..iraq/afghanistan/war on terror
god, so many good political opportunities, just dont call Iraq a civil war, push the domino theory and then scare the elderly into o.d.ing on thier heart pills and you have a winning formula, providing Brendon Nelson doesnt say anything. I mean anything. If you do mention Iraq, throw in the words Alqueda just to be on the safe side. Oh and there are lots of terrorists running around australia, right now, sure we would arrest them, but as Phil Ruddock says, that would just tip them off to the fact that we know who they are and they live NEXT DOOR TO YOU, not that Kevin rudd would care. Watch out for lots of the "alqueda inspired" as opposed to anyone who is really in alqueda, saved our bacon with the "WMD related Programs", language its so flexible, you can make facts just disapear into a void.
Wedge 4...Climate change, no not global warming, you have no idea do you, but we do and its already fixed, cant you understand this. We have fixed it, with no loss of jobs and no need to even bother that hideously expensive blazing orb that circles around the earth several times a week, the sun, thats the one.
Wedge 5...performance pay for teachers. Despite the fact that no evidence can back up the notion that performance pay helps educate or aid teachers (and a resonable amount to suggest it does the opposite), the Labor party are purely against this on ideological grounds and the fact that they are in the pocket of the terrorist inspired unions. Good on so many fronts, especially if you are planning on transfering a goodly amount of the public purse away from public schools and giving it to weirdass Christian sects, not that you will notice it. Parents want "choice" and choice means of course that you are about to have something stolen out of your wallet.
Wedge 6...Pork and plenty of it..find a marginal electorate, give them a couple of million for a steam train no one even knows existed until that moment, then tell them labor have promised to burn the train and kill children if they win office. Best one at the moment though, is the University compensation money for the erradication of the VSU, of the $55 million in the fund, $40 million has gone to marginal electorates in NSW and Queensland, with my state Victoria recieveing less than $1 million. Guess we know how the Liberals polling is going, follow the money.
Wedge 7...Industrial Relations...that is until the full and complete figures for AWA's emerge for the beaurea of stats. Women have never had it so good, sure they work longer hours for less money, now, but thats thier choice to have babys and work those longer hours for less money. Choice people its all about how long you can hide the facts. Ok, we shall have to rely on the small business vote and the those chinese guys who we imported to work for $5.00 a hour, i think we can give them a temporaryvote visa.
Whatever you do dont mention this speech given at the HR NICHOLLS SOCIETY by SENATOR NICK MINCHIN, FINANCE MINISTER: We do need to seek a mandate for the Australian people at the next election for another wave of industrial relations reform.
No need to be alarmed, he was just making a joke about how little we mentioned IR reforms last election, now laugh and pretend you havent a clue. Ahh, isnt that better.
Wedge 8..interest rates...oh shit, tried that, well worked once and you fell for it, cant hurt to try, its your wallet and kevin rudd is smart enough to steal it when your distracted by the terrorists he plans to employ to look after your children. He told me himself, thats what he wants to do, believe me people.
Wedge 9...Kevin Rudd is to smart to run the country, you heard me, he is an egg head, and is so much smarter than you. You dont want someone like that running a country do you, it would make you look stupid in front of your kids. Think of your children. Dumb voters have been making smart choices for ten years now for a really not very inteligent reason, why stop, we are just getting this party started.
Wedge...10..Ideas and strenght(well slogans)...Labor are all over the place, they are trying to be all things to all people, they are having it both ways, then having it all ways, and then some. Our focus groups are telling us this is a winner, so we are gonna pound it into your heads. Its a little like flip flop, but not quite as catchy, so look forward to a marketable phrase in the near future. Ok, so the Labor party have been against the Iraqi Situation of Blossoming Success from day one, but Rudd has said that he wants our troops to wear a yellow armband, well isnt that typical, he has flip flopped and wants to hold all positions on the matter. Its just him playing politics and wanting to walk both sides of the street. Us we never change our minds on anything, once we see something we do it, even when its completely wrong and causes a complete disaster, we will hold true to our orginal thought, no matter how unpopular or wrong. Unless it cant be wedged somehow and then, well, we will do something different when Alan Jones tells us to.
Wedge 11...The US...we love em, and they all live in the Whitehouse, which is a wonderous place of candy and the sun shines every minute of the day on the blessings that they are given by virtue of the fact that they are never, ever, wrong about anything. We hope that there is never another change of government in the US and we will be working towards that. Bush is the greatest. Labor spits on Americans and will abort their babies, on demand.
Wedge 12..David Hicks..dont tell anyone, he will be brought home during the election, but only if he promises to say that "John Howard is the greatest and has enriched my life". if not, fuk him, let the communist rot.
Prime Minister John Howard says Melbourne businessman Ron Walker told him last year about his plan to start a nuclear energy company. "The Government is not having any secret discussions," Mr Howard told Parliament. (we just didnt think it was worthwhile telling anyone about it)
and a nice little secret chicken and the egg scenario for our increasingly weasily, PM. So how about a referndum on the matter at the next election, how about calling it now.
wedge 2 ...immigration
new citzenship tests, the "values" and "history" tests and of course, the english test. Will there be a burqua test, eg if you wear a burqua, or if you want to push it a bit further a scarfe, you fail. Never underestimate the power of a percentage of the Australian electorate to vote them immigrants elsewhere, even while eating a souvlaki or wolfing down some yum cha. WhiteAustralia will make a values laden comeback, I think that "White Power" t-shirts should be compulsory at all citzenship ceremonies, that should sort the wheat fromthe shovels.
Prime Minister John Howard seems to be appealing to supporters of Queensland politician Pauline Hanson with his package of change to citizenship laws, Australian Democrats leader Lyn Allison says."It's very difficult to understand why the government is doing this, except to say it's part of the prime minister's package of demonising those who come from other countries, appealing to the Hansonite supporters of this world who essentially don't want to see Australia as anything but white Australian."
wedge 3..iraq/afghanistan/war on terror
god, so many good political opportunities, just dont call Iraq a civil war, push the domino theory and then scare the elderly into o.d.ing on thier heart pills and you have a winning formula, providing Brendon Nelson doesnt say anything. I mean anything. If you do mention Iraq, throw in the words Alqueda just to be on the safe side. Oh and there are lots of terrorists running around australia, right now, sure we would arrest them, but as Phil Ruddock says, that would just tip them off to the fact that we know who they are and they live NEXT DOOR TO YOU, not that Kevin rudd would care. Watch out for lots of the "alqueda inspired" as opposed to anyone who is really in alqueda, saved our bacon with the "WMD related Programs", language its so flexible, you can make facts just disapear into a void.
Wedge 4...Climate change, no not global warming, you have no idea do you, but we do and its already fixed, cant you understand this. We have fixed it, with no loss of jobs and no need to even bother that hideously expensive blazing orb that circles around the earth several times a week, the sun, thats the one.
Wedge 5...performance pay for teachers. Despite the fact that no evidence can back up the notion that performance pay helps educate or aid teachers (and a resonable amount to suggest it does the opposite), the Labor party are purely against this on ideological grounds and the fact that they are in the pocket of the terrorist inspired unions. Good on so many fronts, especially if you are planning on transfering a goodly amount of the public purse away from public schools and giving it to weirdass Christian sects, not that you will notice it. Parents want "choice" and choice means of course that you are about to have something stolen out of your wallet.
Wedge 6...Pork and plenty of it..find a marginal electorate, give them a couple of million for a steam train no one even knows existed until that moment, then tell them labor have promised to burn the train and kill children if they win office. Best one at the moment though, is the University compensation money for the erradication of the VSU, of the $55 million in the fund, $40 million has gone to marginal electorates in NSW and Queensland, with my state Victoria recieveing less than $1 million. Guess we know how the Liberals polling is going, follow the money.
Wedge 7...Industrial Relations...that is until the full and complete figures for AWA's emerge for the beaurea of stats. Women have never had it so good, sure they work longer hours for less money, now, but thats thier choice to have babys and work those longer hours for less money. Choice people its all about how long you can hide the facts. Ok, we shall have to rely on the small business vote and the those chinese guys who we imported to work for $5.00 a hour, i think we can give them a temporaryvote visa.
Whatever you do dont mention this speech given at the HR NICHOLLS SOCIETY by SENATOR NICK MINCHIN, FINANCE MINISTER: We do need to seek a mandate for the Australian people at the next election for another wave of industrial relations reform.
No need to be alarmed, he was just making a joke about how little we mentioned IR reforms last election, now laugh and pretend you havent a clue. Ahh, isnt that better.
Wedge 8..interest rates...oh shit, tried that, well worked once and you fell for it, cant hurt to try, its your wallet and kevin rudd is smart enough to steal it when your distracted by the terrorists he plans to employ to look after your children. He told me himself, thats what he wants to do, believe me people.
Wedge 9...Kevin Rudd is to smart to run the country, you heard me, he is an egg head, and is so much smarter than you. You dont want someone like that running a country do you, it would make you look stupid in front of your kids. Think of your children. Dumb voters have been making smart choices for ten years now for a really not very inteligent reason, why stop, we are just getting this party started.
Wedge...10..Ideas and strenght(well slogans)...Labor are all over the place, they are trying to be all things to all people, they are having it both ways, then having it all ways, and then some. Our focus groups are telling us this is a winner, so we are gonna pound it into your heads. Its a little like flip flop, but not quite as catchy, so look forward to a marketable phrase in the near future. Ok, so the Labor party have been against the Iraqi Situation of Blossoming Success from day one, but Rudd has said that he wants our troops to wear a yellow armband, well isnt that typical, he has flip flopped and wants to hold all positions on the matter. Its just him playing politics and wanting to walk both sides of the street. Us we never change our minds on anything, once we see something we do it, even when its completely wrong and causes a complete disaster, we will hold true to our orginal thought, no matter how unpopular or wrong. Unless it cant be wedged somehow and then, well, we will do something different when Alan Jones tells us to.
Wedge 11...The US...we love em, and they all live in the Whitehouse, which is a wonderous place of candy and the sun shines every minute of the day on the blessings that they are given by virtue of the fact that they are never, ever, wrong about anything. We hope that there is never another change of government in the US and we will be working towards that. Bush is the greatest. Labor spits on Americans and will abort their babies, on demand.
Wedge 12..David Hicks..dont tell anyone, he will be brought home during the election, but only if he promises to say that "John Howard is the greatest and has enriched my life". if not, fuk him, let the communist rot.
posted by the bluhamster at 1:41 PM
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